Lord, Don’t You Care?

I remember sitting on my bathroom floor one Saturday morning, tears streaming down my face as I asked God, “Lord, don’t you care?

Don’t you care that I’m lonely, sad, and overwhelmed?”

Fourteen months earlier, I had sold my house, packed up my belongings, and left my family and friends in Alabama in order to move to Memphis, Tennessee for a new job.

I was excited that I had the privilege to work with some amazing teenage girls and truly loved my job. But on this particular day, it hit me hard that I had just turned 36, was single, and had no prospect for a husband. The loneliness engulfed me on that sunny August day.

The memory of that day is still vivid because the Lord’s presence was so real.

I never felt guilty for asking if He cared. Why? Because Jesus came for messy moments like mine.

Psalm 34:18 (NIV) says, “The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit.”

That day, I was brokenhearted over unfulfilled dreams and desires, and honestly, the fear and uncertainty of the future.

I knew Jesus was with me, but I just didn’t see Him working at the time. But I also knew I wasn’t the only one who had ever felt that way.

In Mark 4:37-40 (NIV) we see some guys who were overcome with fear:

“A furious storm arose and the waves broke over the boat, so that it was nearly swamped. Jesus was in the stern, sleeping on a cushion. The disciples woke him and asked, ‘Teacher, don’t you care if we drown?’ Jesus got up, rebuked the wind and said to the waves, ‘Quiet! Be still!’ Then the wind died down and it was completely calm. He said to his disciples, ‘Why are you so afraid? Do you still have no faith?’”

As I read this passage, I saw a group of guys who were in the presence of Jesus but still struggled with their fears. The storm seemed to be overtaking them, and to them, Jesus didn’t seem to be working in their lives. Jesus’ disciples were struggling with fear and uncertainty, just like I was. I knew I was in the Lord’s presence, but I struggled with trusting that He was working, especially when the storm of insecurity raged on.

Jesus then addressed the disciples with two questions: “Why are you so afraid? Do you still have no faith?”

In other words, “I’m here with you, and you can trust Me.”

I remember crying out to the Lord to calm the storm and help me trust and believe that He was working in my life, even when I couldn’t see it. Isn’t that what faith really is?

Hebrews 11:1 (NIV) says, “Now faith is being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see.”

There was another lady in scripture who asked Jesus the same question. Her name was Martha.

In Luke 10:40 (NIV), it says, “But Martha was distracted by many things that had to be done. She came to Jesus and asked, ‘Lord, don’t you care that my sister has left me to do all the work by myself? Tell her to help me.’”

Martha’s situation was different from the disciples. She was in the presence of Jesus, but her distractions caused her to struggle with all that had to be done.

“Martha, Martha,” the Lord answered, “You are worried and upset about many things, but only one thing is needed. Mary has chosen what is better, and it will not be taken from her.” (Luke 10:41-42)

Confession: I tend to be a Martha, easily distracted by many things. I’ve often run to Jesus, complaining about things caused by my own choices. (Please tell me I’m not alone.)

Both the disciples and Martha were in the presence of Jesus. Both struggled with fear, worry, and uncertainty. Both chose to talk to the Lord about what was going on in their lives. And the beauty of Jesus is that He met them where they were!

We don’t have to have it all together as women, and we don’t have to be afraid to talk with Jesus about how we really feel. Jesus knows, Jesus cares, and Jesus longs for us to come to Him.

Nahum 1:7 says, “The Lord is good, a refuge in times of trouble. He cares for those who trust in Him.”

1 Peter 5:6-7 says, “Humble yourselves, therefore, under God’s mighty hand, that He may lift you up in due time. Cast all your anxiety on Him because He cares for you.”

It’s been almost 20 years since that Saturday when I cried, struggled, and questioned the Lord on my bathroom floor. Although there have been other days since, that day stands out as a stone of remembrance in my life. I cried and prayed for hours, but in the late afternoon, a friend called and asked me to go to a baseball game with her and some other girls.

So, I dried my tears, reapplied my makeup, and decided to go. Little did I know, but the man Ive been married to for almost 18 years was at that game. We talked for a while, and he bought me a Coke. Although it would be several months before he asked me out on a date, I remember climbing into bed that night, smiling up at the Lord, and saying, “Thank you for reminding me that you care.”

So many of us are struggling with fears, uncertainty, and even betrayal. Sometimes, storms engulf our lives that weren’t even on the radar, and you too are asking, “Lord, don’t you care?”

Please know this: He sees and understands your broken heart and crushed spirit. Sit with Him, cry with Him, and make Him your refuge.

Remember that He is still good in the midst of uncertainty. As you humble yourself under His mighty hand, trust that He will lift you up in due time. I pray that you will cast all your anxiety on Him, knowing that He truly does care for you! (1 Peter 5:6-7)